


In Ecstasy

by mcgarrygirl78



Series: How Soon is Now? [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama, F/M, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-19
Updated: 2011-10-19
Packaged: 2017-10-24 18:33:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/266582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It could be something else…if we wanted it to be.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Ecstasy

**Author's Note:**

> Documentaries on drug use and listening to Reba McEntire songs…this is what my mind does to me. I used the canon history of Hotch working for Ambassador Prentiss’ detail right before Emily went off to Yale. It’s been done before, by many writers, and now it’s being done by me. There is drug use in this story and the song used, And Still, came out in 1994 but I switched it around to 1989 for my own purposes, cuz I can do that sometimes. This is How Soon is Now #1.

Hotch reached blindly for the loud ringing phone. He tried to turn on the lamp and finally succeeded in both.

“Hotchner.”

“Hotch? Hi.”

“Um, hi. Who is this?”

“Hotch?”

“Yes. Who is this?”

“It’s me, Emily.”

“Emily?” Hotch sat up in bed, his wits coming back. The clock next to his cordless phone said 1:52am.

“Emily, what's going on?”

“I need you. I didn’t know…who else was I going to call? I just need you Hotch.”

“Emily, what's going on? I thought we…where are you?”

“I'm not sure.”

She was speaking so softly that Hotch had to struggle to hear her. He was already out of bed and grabbing a tee shirt from his top drawer to put on with his sweats.

“You have to tell me where you are. Have you been doing drugs?”

“A little bit.”

“Dammit. Emily, I'm going to pick you up but you have to tell me where you are. Are you near any landmarks?”

“I see cabs and streetlights.” She replied.

“I need more than that. Do you see any statues, restaurants?”

“I'm near a church…will you find me?”

“I'm going to try. What's the name of the church?”

“I don’t know.”

Hotch tried to take a deep breath. Dammit, dammit, dammit, this girl was going to be the death of him. It might be a nice death; actually there were moments when Hotch thought it might be worth the risk. This was not one of them.

“You have to think Emily. I cannot find you if you can't tell me where you are.”

“Connecticut. I'm in Connecticut, Hotch.”

“The state?” he asked incredulously.

“The avenue silly.” Emily laughed. “Something and Connecticut, near a pretty church.”

Hotch thought he might know where she was and that was surely not a neighborhood for a rich girl at this hour. His heart dropped to his stomach thinking about someone hurting her before he could get there.

“Are you at pay phone?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“OK, hang up with me and go into the church. Do not leave the church until I get there; I will be there in 15 minutes.”

“Are you going to pick me up?”

“Yes. Hang up and go into the church. Please Emily.”

“I will. I'm kinda freaked out.”

“Don’t be freaked out…I’ll be right there.”

He reluctantly hung up the phone. Hotch didn’t want to break the connection but he moved as fast as he could out of his apartment and into his truck. The hour was late but there was still too much traffic on the street. He didn’t want to get pulled over so Hotch did his best to take his time. There were no parking spaces around so he double parked in front of St. Cecilia’s and rushed inside. Emily Prentiss sat in a pew in the back and no one else was around.

“Hey.” He stood outside of the pew.

“You came.”

She threw her arms around him, the scent of her perfume as intoxicating as it always was. Hotch did his best to put some distance between them but failed…she had a kung fu grip when she was nervous or afraid.

“Of course I did. What the hell were you doing tonight?”

“Can we just go home?” Emily asked.

“What home? If your mother sees you like this she is going to have a complete nervous breakdown and you might end up in a nunnery in the Swiss Alps.”

“Take me to your apartment, Hotch.”

He wanted to protest but they had to get out of there. With a sigh of resignation, he took her hand and led her out of the church. Buckled up in his truck he headed back to Georgetown. There were a million things he wanted to say but Hotch couldn’t even bring himself to look at herself. He was angry.

“Thanks.” She murmured.

“You might not want to talk to me right now.”

“Why? I love talking to you.”

“What the hell are you doing on some seedy DC street at 2 in the damn morning, Prentiss? The world is not the bubble of your big house on the hill. You could have been robbed, molested, or worse. What the hell were you thinking?”

“Don’t you dare talk to me that way? I'm not some stupid kid.”

“That’s what you're acting like.” he replied.

“Fuck you Hotch! You think you're so morally superior to everyone else and you're not. You're fucked up just like the rest of us. You're not perfect.”

“I never said I was.”

“You always manage to say I'm not.”

“I'm not talking about this anymore.”

“Fine, to hell with you.”

She folded her arms and looked out the window. Hotch popped a tape in the deck because the silence was going to kill him. The voice of Reba McEntire filled the truck; he glanced at Emily’s profile as the words took shape.

 _Thousands of people live in this town_  
And I had to run into him  
When I saw him there on that busy street  
Those feelings came back again  
There was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide  
He walked up to me, looked in my eyes

“Sometimes you infuriate the hell out of me.” Hotch said.

“The feeling is mutual.” Emily didn’t turn away from the window.

“Emily…”

“That’s going to be us one day you know. We’ll run into each other years later on some busy DC street and try to find something to say to each other.”

“I hope that’s not us.”

 _And still, the world stood still_  
I couldn’t move and all I could feel  
Was this aching in my heart  
Saying I loved him still

“What else could it be, Hotch?”

“Where are your friends?” he needed to change the subject. “Why were you wandering around alone if you went out with friends?”

“I wouldn’t actually call Nina, Kelly, and Cynthia friends. I don’t have any friends; they are just people I know. The party was loud and insane; we got separated. I ended up outside in an alley trying to get some air and I couldn’t get back in. It was creepy out there, I can handle myself but I just wanted to go home. So I called you.”

“It could be something else…if we wanted it to be.” Hotch replied.

“And you tell me I live in a fantasy world.”

“I've never said that.”

She didn’t say anything else. Hotch found a parking spot a few blocks from his apartment so he took it and they got out. She slid her hand in his as they walked down the deserted streets, Hotch looking straight ahead. To the untrained eye they just looked like lovers coming back from a night out. Except Emily was dressed in an overpriced black mini dress, heels and a red blazer and Hotch wore sweats and a tee shirt. And they weren’t lovers.

What they were he really had no idea. He was a rookie FBI Agent on his first job out of the Academy on the security detail of Ambassador Elizabeth Prentiss. He had been on the job just a few weeks when he got the babysitting gig for young Emily. None of the veterans wanted the job, well one seemed to want it too much, and Hotch kept him far away from the seventeen year old. Jesus, she was seventeen when they first met, starting her senior year at Garfield High School.

Her mother was mortified at the idea of her only child in the halls of a public school but Emily stood her ground. She wanted stability and it was just her senior year. She was tired of tutors and boarding school was out of the question. So off she went and Hotch was there to pick her up and drop her off. It was a bit humiliating but everyone had to start somewhere. He was immediately taken with the strange, smart, and beautiful raven haired teenager; it crossed the line to something more on his 25th birthday. That was nine months ago.

As she walked into his tiny apartment she slipped out of her shoes and blazer, turning and smiling at him.

“You infuriate me.” He repeated.

“You know you like it.”

“Actually…”

“What? You don’t like it.” She walked closer to him, slipping her arms around his neck.

“Emily, sometimes…”

“Shh. There isn’t much time left for us; talk is cheap. I know something better.”

She got down on her knees, her hand pressing against his cock. Hotch wasn’t wearing boxers because he didn’t have time to throw them on when he was worrying that someone might hurt her.

“Get off your knees.” He said through clenched teeth.

“You don’t like me on my knees?” she mouthed his erection.

“Dammit, Emily.” His hands were rough as he pulled her back up to her feet.

“Just tell me you don’t want me, tell me you don't want me and we won't even have to pretend.”

“Why does it have to be everything or nothing? Why can't…”

“Shut the hell up.”

Her kiss was hard and passionate. Hotch growled, pulling her to him as he deepened the kiss. Emily smiled against his mouth and held on tight as they moved into the bedroom. They barely came apart as Emily lifted the tee shirt over his head. On the mattress, she wrapped her legs around her and held him close.

“My God, I want you.” He murmured, moving to suck on her earlobe. “I can't help it.”

“Don’t help it, just fuck me Hotch.”

“I don’t want to do that, not tonight.”

Emily pinched his nipple, hard, and Hotch groaned. He reached behind her, unzipping her dress and pulling it over her head. Naked except for a pair of satin panties, his mouth devoured her breasts. He wanted to be gentle, wanted to be sweet, but her body drove him mad. He would suck, nibble, and bite; Emily moaned and arched her back. When she cried out his name it made him crazy. Hotch pulled away.

“Where are you going?” she asked.

“I don’t want to lose control.”

“Let go.”

“If I hurt you I will never forgive myself.”

“I'm stronger than I look…you should know that by now. C'mere.”

Hotch did let go. He grabbed hold of her panties, snapping the little satin string and freeing her from them. Two fingers, thick and eager, moved inside of her.

“Ohhh, oh Hotch. Mmm…”

She bit his lip and Hotch drew back but he kept fucking her. He loved the way she writhed and moaned underneath him; his thumb stroking over her clit in circles.

“Oh God, Aaron, Aaron!”

“Damn you're beautiful. Let me burn in hell but my God you're beautiful. Come for me, Emily.”

Her eyes rolled back in her head as she felt herself falling. She gripped the cotton sheets, the orgasm moving through her like a freight train.

“Jesus!”

Hotch kissed her softly, knowing the first round had satisfied her enough for him to slow down.

“Emily?”

“Don’t talk.” She whispered.

“I want to talk.”

“I don’t,” she pulled down his sweats and stroked his cock. Hotch moaned in her ear, pushing them off his feet. She loved his cock. It was hard, thick, fit her perfectly. Aaron Hotchner was not her first, there had been more than she was willing to admit to, but he was her favorite. He had this tendency to want to make love, though he never used the words. He didn’t want to be rough or frantic.

“Hey, stop.” He took her hands, holding her wrists. “I mean it.”

She didn't say anything but she stopped. Hotch leaned to kiss her eyelids. He kissed her cheekbones, the tip of her nose, and then her lips. His kisses were soft; he felt Emily relax under his touch. Letting go of her hands, Hotch felt her arms slide around his neck.

He moved his lips down her neck as his hands cup her breasts. Her body was so perfect; he found himself thinking about when he certainly should not have been. At work, at home, during drills and meetings with his superiors Hotch was fantasizing about his boss’ daughter. The guilt was enough to eat him alive, if naughty Emily didn’t do that first.

“Hotch...” she arched her back to get closer to him.

“Hmm?” he nuzzled her neck.

“Make love to me. We don’t need to wait anymore.”

“I can't wait.”

“Tell me how I make you feel, Aaron.” She took his face in her hands.

“We don’t need words,” he shook his head as he grabbed a condom from the nightstand drawer. “We never have.”

Emily lifted her knees, spreading her thighs as she felt him deep inside of her. Gripping his hips, she whimpered and pressed her head deep into the pillow.

“Oh God,” Hotch groaned, pressing deeper. “Oh Emily.”

“Mmm, yeah,” she kissed him.

Hotch’s strokes were long and slow, so deep that Emily thought she would always feel him there. She bucked her hips trying to get him to move faster but he was running the show. It was hard for her to give up the control but when she opened her eyes and saw his smile, she returned it.

“I want to make love to you.” He whispered. “I can hardly tell you how much.”

“No words, remember. And you're doing a really good job right now.”

He grinned, kissing her as his hands caressed her face. Emily gripped him tighter as his movements quickened, thrusting deep and pulling back in rapid succession. She lost the ability to speak, to tease him like she always did.

She was going to come again and this time Emily helped herself along. Watching her touch herself was quite an enjoyable experience and tonight was no different. Still moving with him, Emily brought herself closer and closer to oblivion. Hotch put his hand on top of hers; felt the hard piece of flesh pulse and contract.

She shut her eyes tight, whimpering his name. Hotch let the tidal wave pull him under and they shared a climax that left them both breathless.

“Don’t you move,” Emily said when her voice returned. “I want you inside of me.”

“I'm here.”

He didn’t know how long he lingered in her but Hotch eventually moved onto the mattress, covering himself with a sheet. Emily didn’t seem to care about her nudity; she turned on her side to look at him. Her smile was sweet but sexy.

“What drugs were you doing tonight?” he asked.

“A little X, nothing outrageous.”

“I wish you wouldn’t. That stuff lowers your inhibitions.”

“I know, isn’t it wonderful?”

“I'm being serious Emily. And with those idiots who are not your friends…I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“I was just blowing off steam, Hotch. Didn’t you do crazy things in your youth? Sometimes you get a little wasted and dance with a bunch of people who just want to feel love. I'm a good girl Hotch; I'm practically perfect in everyway. I wear my hair right, I speak right, I wear the right dresses and read the right books. And in three weeks I'm going to the right college.”

“I thought you wanted to go to Yale.” Hotch said.

“I do, but it’s mostly to get the hell out of here. Barnard was my first choice.”

“That’s Ivy League as well. You didn’t get in?”

“Of course I got in. My mother wouldn’t let me go. She thinks New York City is too dangerous.” Emily laughed but it was mirthless. “Yeah because you know Moscow at the height of the Cold War was a picnic and the Middle East in the 70s was a playground for a little girl. She’s a damn hypocrite.”

“I didn’t know you spent time in the Middle East.”

“My father worked for the embassies in Riyadh, then Amman, and finally Beirut. We left in 1981. The place was a damn war zone but Manhattan is dangerous?”

“What happened to your father, Emily?”

“I think my mother ate him.”

Hotch didn’t mean to laugh but the answer caught him off guard. He smiled when she moved into his arms.

“He died.” Emily barely whispered. “I was 12; it was a Polo accident in Potomac, MD. My father was an equestrian his whole life and he fell off of a temperamental horse and broke his neck. At least that was always Mother’s story. Divorce is frowned upon in our social setting Hotch, but a widow, oh a widow gets to keep everything and have even more.”

“What are you saying?” he asked.

“I'm saying she probably ate him.”

He sighed, stroking her short, dark hair. He liked it better long but she cut it recently to right below her ears. She said she was tired of the tresses. While he thought he wanted to look less like her mother, Hotch never called her on it.

“I'm being reassigned.”

“When?”

“September first. I did my first year and now I am free to move on.”

“Your sentence is up?”

“It wasn’t all bad. I had it better than some rookies and they don’t mind telling me so. There are some who think I had it real good.”

“Fuck them.” Emily replied.

“That’s what I usually think.”

“Where are you going?”

“I don’t know. I still don’t have my choice of assignments; I was able to put in for four. I really want to go to Seattle…there is good work being done out of that field office.”

Emily’s breath hitched in her throat. Washington State was as far away as one could go and still be in the 48 contiguous states. Did he really want to get away from her that much?

“You're going off to Yale and…”

“You don’t have to explain.”

“I’d like to.”

“Well I don’t want to hear it, OK? I'm used to it Hotch, no one that I love stays around for very long. In the beginning that hurt so much I could hardly bear it but now…such is life.”

“Don’t think I'm not going to miss you.”

“You'll be too busy, kicking ass and taking names. They are going to have to invent more hero awards to give out when they get a load of you.”

“I just want to be good at what I do. They recruited me; they must have seen something.”

“I know what I see.” Emily said.

“What?”

“You’re one of the good guys. You are handsome, smart, capable, and strong; how can a girl not fall madly in love with you.”

“We should get some sleep,” Hotch held her tighter. “I need to get you home really early. Your mother wakes with the crows but maybe…”

“She is still in London; won't be back until Monday afternoon.”

“So I can make you breakfast?” Hotch asked.

“Definitely.” She snuggled under the sheet and in his arms.

He wanted to tell her he was in love with her too, madly, but it wasn’t right. This couldn’t last, this bliss. He was risking his new career and God knows what else just being with her right now. But he wanted to love her, hold onto her before a fierce wind blew her away. Emily Prentiss was one of the strongest people he had ever known.

Who really knew all she dealt with while living what some might consider to be a globe-trotting, cosmopolitan life? She could not even go to the college she wanted to. She couldn’t deviate from her mother’s great life plan. It didn’t matter that she was suffocating and no one saw it but him. Hotch was afraid that this would be the last time he held her, kissed her, saw her again.

He was afraid someday in the future he would get a phone call and someone would tell him of the tragic end of Emily Prentiss. He wanted to believe she was stronger than that, had actually seen it with his own eyes. His nightmares always saw the demons grabbing her and pulling her into hell. He was still running from his, even all these years later. Hotch wanted to hold tight to her, keep her running alongside of him. Maybe, if he held on tight enough neither of them would have to run anymore. Too bad Emily was already slipping through his fingers.

***


End file.
